Although the definition of happiness varies from person to person, however, the one thing common in all the definitions is achieving something. Therefore, for some happiness is achieving excellence in their professional career for others it is achieving a particular figure in their bank balance. Thus, happiness is a relative term, yet achievement is the core of it.
All the lives we have been told to pursue something and that the pursuit and achievement of that very thing will bring us happiness. Thus, for us, happiness is an actual thing that just happens as a result of something and which cannot be fabricated or synthesized. This is where we are Wrong!
No denying the fact that achievement of some kind brings actual happiness, however, happiness can also be synthesized and this synthesis of happiness is what is the solution for all the pursuits of finding the secret of happiness. Thus, if you are able to synthesize happiness, you won’t need to take blood pressure medicine or worry about the unforeseen future. If you become good at synthesizing happiness, then you will be happy no matter how difficult the circumstances are and no matter how much adversity you face in life.
The Secret Of Happiness:
By now we have made it clear that we can synthesize happiness it is all a matter of seeing the other side of the picture. These things can turn a little abstract for our scientific minds; therefore, I give you the logical secret of happiness. If you wish to synthesize happiness in the most adverse situations and in the difficult times, then the secret is to limit freedom of choice.
You must be wondering what? Freedom of choice? This freedom of choice is the greatest gift to humanity how can its elimination be associated with happiness let alone synthesizing happiness?
You all are right in your reservation and whatever is coming to your mind I also had to face it, however, after thorough analysis, I reached the conclusion that these limitless choices are what makes us unhappy and cause us to fret even in the most convenient and luxurious lifestyle. Let me explain it to you with an example.
Before moving on with the example let us have something clear so that we are on the same page. Those who win millions of dollars in the lottery and those who face some calamity in life, the intensity in their passion decreases with time. The lottery winner after a few years isn’t that happy when they were at the time of winning the lottery, and those who have undergone some calamity after a few years aren’t as sad as they were when they faced that particular incident. Therefore, if happiness was an achievement of something and sadness was the loss of something, then these people would have stayed happy or sad all their lives. Thus, the achievement part is not true pertaining to happiness.
Now consider you were an entrepreneur who had two great ideas both of equal worth. You were given the choice to choose any of them with the condition that you can revert to the other one at any time. Thus, after due consideration, you will choose a particular idea and move forward with it, but during the course as you have the choice of choosing the other one anytime, you will start disliking your present undertaking and will start off thinking the other one. Hence, you will eventually undertake the other one and once you are halfway through it, you will realize that your prior choice was much better. Thus, this cycle of choices because of the freedom of choice will go on and on.
Consider another scenario, where you were allowed to choose one idea and go on with its implementation without the freedom of reverting to the other. Now in this case, as you would choose your idea with due consideration, you will keep on thinking good things about your selection and consider your choice the best choice. Thus, you will be more happy and satisfied, primarily because you don’t have any other option to look forward to.
In short, the point which I want to make is that when you have little choices, you try to find the best in what you have; you can call this ‘contentment’. This contentment is the secret to happiness and it will keep you happy regardless of whether you have achieved something or have lost it after trying.
Now it’s Your Turn!
Do you agree with my secret of happiness? What is the secret to happiness according to you? How do you remain happy and what strategies did you deploy to be happy? Share your experiences and thoughts in the comments section.
Lovely post indeed 🙂
I certainly agree with your secret of happiness, and it surely IS contentment. My granny used to say – very little is needed to lead a happy life, but being humans, we keep striving for more and lead our lives just struggling most of the time.
Happiness is actually a state of mind. You can be happy whenever you want, by just being happy and content with what you have – it takes a split second to turn your unhappiness to happiness, provided you are ready to think positive and in that direction. I guess that’s the reason you find many poor people lead happy lives, while the rich, even though they have millions are unhappy.
Thanks for sharing. Have a nice week ahead 🙂
Tuning into the goodness of each moment expands your happiness.
Practice. We are alive. What a blessing, and a reason to be happy no matter WHAT happens. Practice shifting your focus and you really can be happy most of the time.
Thanks for sharing Nate!
I think contentment is a trap. It has been said many times that we fail to succeed in life, not because we aim too high and miss, but because we aim too low and hit. I do agree, however, that gratitude is essential and I would use that to celebrate my happiness.
in terms of career and business, i prefer blogging and freelance writing. i will focus on achieving my goals in blogging and freelance writing and will not shift to other sources of income. i think this is a good limitation since i love writing in the first place 🙂
goals in motherhood is a different story since it is a forever responsibility
Our mind really does play a huge part in our overall happiness and we alone can be in control of our own feelings. Since having my daughter I have realized that it is really the very basic things that make me happy. Having said that, my big goal is to work from home to enable me to be with my family more and work the hours that I choose. I think this will create even more happiness 🙂
I get what you’re saying here Nate – it’s like keeping your eye on the prize. You have to focus on your goal and follow your plan to achieve it.
I also teach people to have a plan and stick with it rather than run to the “bright and shiny” – not always as easy as we think! Keep a note book of other ideas for later if you need to, but don’t keep starting without finishing. That’s like turning around at the 10 yard line and not making the touchdown!
In my opinion, happiness is a state of mind and a choice. Many times people discover happiness when they discover their God-given purpose and find ways to fulfill their purpose. Happiness can be found in satisfaction and fulfillment. Sadly, many people learn how to exist and cope with that instead of learning how to live – in the best of times and in the worst of times.
I’m happy to say I’m happy every day! I firmly believe every day is a gift from God and I am happy to be part of His gift. That being said, I am very interested in your “How to crust the competition by ranking your websites high on google”. So, first I must ask, website or websites? Does google care if you have more than one? I’m going to download it now! Thanks!!
I’m happy at the moment. The only thing that can make me happier is a job that has fulfillment.
I think you’ve really hit on something here, Nate. It’s the “grass is greener” scenario. When you completely close off an option you will move full-speed ahead with what you have.
I also think that happiness is a choice to BE happy.
Yes, when we have little choices we find the best in what we have and are therefor content. This goes along so nicely with my article today on multi-taksking. When we practice one-pointed-attention we direct our thought on one task at a time which creates a more peaceful and productive flow. When we take on too many projects at a time through multi-tasking our thoughts becomes scattered which leads to frustration and discontentment. Contentment is the key to happiness!
Thank you for another great message today Nate!
I have learned, happiness is a choice. One that I sometimes have to choose more than once a day as the day changes. Thanks for sharing another perspective!
Another great post. I believe you are absolutely right. If you have no choice to change to, then you will put more effort into what you are already working on.
I think the “Shiny Object Syndrome” causes a lot of this and we just have to learn to not be drawn in by all the hype.
Have a great day. Monna
Nate, your blogs are always so educational and push me to the next level. I have resisted taking my two business selves into one and I really appreciate your guidance!
This is so true. I have to remind myself every day to keep looking for happiness.
I agree with your point. Happiness is everything in life if you are happy then your life will be good.
Well I also believe it totally depends on our choices we made and also depends on our mind. We could be happy in every moment only if we want to be.
Very interesting article Nate! I believe the choices we make should be thoroughly thought about and you must know your ‘why’. Sometimes the idea loses luster when the work kicks in. If you do not give the choice enough due diligence then it will be easy to become disenchanted and bail.
My secret is my family.. they are truly my rock! without them i am not too sure where i would be..
Great post, Nate. I believe happiness for me has changed over the years. What made me happy 10 years ago is not as important now. At the moment, it is being healthy, fit and feeling loved. 🙂
Hi Nate. I think happiness is a choice. We’re never going to be happy when we rely on things outside us to ‘make’ us happy, because once we’ve got them we have to look for the next thing and also because we change our minds as we go along in life what ‘makes’ us happy. If we just choose to be happy whatever, then we just narrow everything down to one choice. Choose to be happy. So yes, having less choice could be said to make us happier!! Andrea
I was just chatting about this with a client today… contentment in the midst of chaos, misunderstandings, and not getting what you were looking for. There is contentment BEYOND the circumstances. Yup! I know. 🙂 Great post Nate!
I don’t think limiting ones choices has anything to do with creating happiness. Having choice is not what determines a persons sense of happiness or not. We do- not choice- how we view ourselves, our life, people in it. We say if we are happy or not.
Interesting thoughts Nate, I believe happiness is a state of mind and that we choose to be ‘happy’ or ‘unhappy’.
I think happiness is a state of mind and therefore it comes from within and you project it out by the choices you make.
Great Article. Thank you for sharing!
Its true when we are content we are happy, but we choose to be content. So I think happiness is a choice. It is like attitude, you can choose good or bad. I think attitude has a part in contentment also.
My upline does have steps for us, however there is much more to this online business that meets the eye so to speak!
According to my 5 years old son, happiness “It’s like, when you are happy and stuff!” I don’t think there is a “secret” to it. It’s a sate of mind. You could have a big house, nice clothes, lots of money and still not have any happiness.
I actually agree with your idea. If we are free to make a choice between two options, and we can switch to the other at any time, we fill ourselves with doubts and ask ourselves “what if”, to the point where we are not happy with our choice.
Human nature – we need to make solid choices, in order to eliminate “what if”.
Recently read the book “Time and Chance” by Alan Brennert. Basically the story of “the road not taken” is the premise. It really does give food for thought given the choice to “try” the road you didn’t take or be satisfied with your current path. Contentment is being happy where you are in life. If not, change it.
Interesting philosophy, Nate. I guess my question is how one decides what to eliminate in order to have limited options. Or do we develop a set of tight criteria and apply it to all the possibilities, thereby creating a short list? Why would we not simply prioritize what’s most important for us to achieve, rather than create artificial scarcity of choice?
Nicely written and well explained.
Interesting perspective which ties in with my philosophy of simplifying your life as well as not giving someone too many choices when presenting an interior design concept. People do get confused with too many choices but also do not want to be confined to only one choice. On another thought, my focus word this year is joy and I am beginning to understand the difference between happiness and joy. For me, happiness is more effected by our circumstances where joy is something that remains available to us even in dire circumstances.
Nate, I do agree with how you present happiness. As you point out with time all things heal or fade…happiness like the lottery or sadness when having a loss. I like how you point out the thought of too many choices…I for one would go back and forth and back and forth, not truly give my whole effort to one knowing the other was on the back burner waiting for me. Good thoughts, I always enjoy your writing.
Most definitely do agree with your secret to happiness. We all have choices and we probably make a few wrong ones in our life but when we make the right choice it is all good. Thanks for sharing.
I agree that happiness stems from achieving something and the freedom of choice. – Toni Lauterio
Happiness! While I was reading your article I thought of the word Joy. Is having Joy the same as having happiness? Happiness can give Joy and having Joy in your life can also bring you happiness. I agree with you that having contentment in your life is also a form of happiness (and Joy). Great thought provoking article.